Igniting Your Divine, Creative Flame
Abigail Fridmann Interviews Ally Markotich
on Soul Kindling
Ally Markotich discusses her new book, Soul Kindling, which combines original poetry and whimsical art to encourage readers to reconnect with their inner fire of creativity and sacred self. Markotich discusses how strengthening her connection to the Sacred Feminine and reframing her idea of God were vital components of her work. In this interview, Ally shares how her journey of healing, influenced by motherhood and spiritual inquiry, led her to embrace creativity as a divine, innate quality and how she hopes other people are able to do the same.
AF: First of all, very excited that we get to do this. This is super cool. Been looking forward to reading the book for, gosh, over a year now. So, how are you feeling now that it is about to actually be published? All of the hard work that you've put into it is coming to fruition.
AM: Yeah, well, I think that this has totally been a dream of mine to have a book, a book that's out on the shelves for people to read. I feel like it is almost the birth of something right now. It just feels like a lot of anticipation and a lot of movement towards that launch, the launching of the book to be out there in the world, and to just bring the inspiration out to people. And that's really what I hope it does.
AF: The cover of it is amazing. The pictures are beautiful (especially for) somebody who is walking through the bookstore scrolling online… Give us a little summary of what the book is about and what people will take away from it.
AM: Yes, so this book is really about exactly what the title is, you know, igniting your sacred creative heart. Soul Kindling means kindling yourself and remembering yourself as a sacred, creative being. That is just something that has been the journey that I myself have been on over particularly the last decade or so, maybe more than that, fifteen years or so, really re-threading myself as a loved, divine, human being. And then, with that being said, also rethreading myself as creative — and not creative as a hobby — but creative as an innate, natural way of being in the world. The book gives the reader poems to dwell upon for them to revisit, for them to really just kind of be with. And then also it gives whimsical art that goes along with it that they can enjoy, and that they can almost in some ways, maybe spark a little bit of that childlike wonder that they had at one point in their lives, and really reawaken something within them where they remember themselves as being playful and joyful and childlike and full of wonder.
AF: It's so interesting that you use that word wonder over and over again, because that is exactly what I took away from it. The first time I read it, I had this question of “what if” or “what next?” Or “how can I”? These are all questions that I think the readers will start asking themselves as they make their way through the book. I'm wondering about your thoughts… You know, this is a tough time to be a woman, for sure. You've got social media. You have constant criticism, whether it be from other people or yourself. Right? We're all our own worst critics. What is your message to women who may be thinking to themselves, “I am not divine. I am not a goddess. I am certainly not sacred; that is not me at all.” What would your message be?
AM: Oh, gosh! You know, I think what's so fascinating, being somebody who does creative work, is when I talk to people, and they say, “Well, what do you do?” Because that's such a common question. What do you do? And I say, “Well, I write, and I do art, and I work with creative practice with people.” Typically, one of the first things people will say to me is, “I'm not creative. I don't know how to draw a line. How do you do that?” And I think that there is such healing around this whole thing, and I think that's what inspires me. We do need healing around this idea that we're somehow disconnected from sacredness, from divine love, and that we're somehow disconnected from ourselves as creators. And I really do sometimes go back to the very first line in Scripture, which is “In the beginning God created.” And just think to myself, if I'm dwelling on that, that our Divine Being in the world created, and we are made in that image. Then we have to do some work around, really rethreading ourselves as creators, and to explore what that might look like, for each person is going to be very different. I use paints and pens and watercolors, but someone else might create with them with movement and dancing, or they might create in the garden, or they might be a writer and write beautiful things. There are all different ways of creating. And I think that we just have to kind of expand this idea of what creating really is.
AF: You just talked a little briefly about healing, the healing process, healing from the criticism or doubts you might have about yourself. So how did you, the author of this book and the illustrator of this book, start this whole sacred creative journey? I imagine it would (involve) a lot of healing.
AM: Yeah, I mean, I think that I think a big prompt for me was becoming a mother. When my oldest son was a baby, I really started to ask a lot of questions around what I believed. That's really where it began. I would think about mothering and all of these ideas that come to us, whether it's from our own families or from the culture itself. And I would think to myself, “Why (do) I believe that?” “Where did that thought come from, and why?” Sometimes I would go, “I don't wanna act on that, or I don't wanna do that thing.”
I had grown up Catholic, and so I was familiar with the Catholic tradition. But I always felt a little separated within that tradition from God, like that God was somehow higher and above me and was definitely masculine, was definitely a man. I think the questions, those questions of really just becoming curious about what I myself was in belief of and going, “Okay, this is going to lead to some kind of exploration for myself,” and I started to meet people who invited me into things, and it was like following the lights on my path that were leading me to kind of those sacred inquiries for myself, and I certainly have not done this journey on my own. I mean, there's just been so many people who have, you know, people and resources that have impacted me throughout, you know, throughout this time, particularly in getting back into creative practices or getting back to myself as a creative being. I think that it really started with those spiritual questions for myself because that was where I really began going, “Oh, I am! I am loved. I think I'm loved by this Divine Source… Let me explore that.” And eventually, that led me into work specifically around faith practices and contemplative practices. And then that led me to find myself as a creative person again and letting creativity really become my prayer. And that's kind of how I see the art and the poetry in the book is really, I see it as a prayer.
AF: We have been talking about your book, you and I, for a little over a year now, but you've been writing, and you've been journaling and painting for I mean, years. I imagine that you have faced some challenges or writer's block throughout that time. Talk a little bit about that and how you managed to push through it.
AM: Yeah. Well, I would say for me, I have to remember for myself that it's not about the end product. And I think that is something that the culture tells us that you have to make a pretty picture from the time we're little people, it's like it has to look good at the end. And there's really something about letting yourself be in the process. And to really just kind of engage in, almost like the ugliness of creativity and just going. I'm not gonna worry about what this thing looks like. I'm just going to put something down, and I think that for me, especially with writing and with art, is sometimes I will resist coming down to this room, which is my creative space, to dive in and really engage. But, as soon as I do, all I have to do is start with a line or a color, and then there's a peace that washes over me when I just give myself the time and the space to do it.
I know the (creative) blocks come, and I just have this little saying that I say to myself, and I think it's even in one of the poems. I can't remember off the top of my head. But it’s “Return, Return.” It's this call of the spirit to return. Return. Come back to yourself. Come back to your creative center. When you get off the path, you just have to come back. You just have to come back. Oftentimes, once we're off the path for a while, that's where that critical voice comes in and we start to berate ourselves, and we start to say, “Oh, there you go again! You know you didn't stay true to what you said you were going to do,” and we can really spiral ourselves down, and if we can replace that voice with “Return, Return,” it can make all the difference in the world.
AF: Yeah, I find it so interesting. In Soul Kindling, there are two themes throughout it. It's this healing of the inner child, and then it's also looking ahead to the woman or the person that you will become or that you're working towards. And I think that that will be so healing for a lot of people. And I just thought that it was such a lovely part of the book, one that you know everyone will take something away from.
AM: Thank you. There's definitely a connection between mother and child, that in our lives, there's just so much invitation for healing work, for healing our own inner child, for doing the healing work around, and particularly, you know, MotherGod. I felt very radical putting that on the cover of the book, and having that be really throughout the book because we are so inundated, or I mean, I'll just speak for myself: I have been so inundated by the masculine language within traditional institutions. You know how we are taught God is solely male, and He is a “he.” This healing work around bringing balance to the divine just feels very important. It's not to delete the masculine, but it is to introduce the feminine and to introduce the mother into the conversation, and I feel like I have been very involved in traditional church life for many years. And there's a lot of healing that takes place with the Father for people, because when you have the umbrella of the Divine Being: a Father who loves, and a Father who gives grace, and a Father who welcomes, and all of this kind of stuff that can be incredibly healing for people.
I just sit back and go, “And where is that same grace for the Divine Mother and for our lives?” And so that thread of kind of focusing and bringing healing to ourselves and our inner child, and recognizing that there is going to be a pilgrimage, and there is going to be a transition and a transformation along the way. When we enter into the deeper soul work for ourselves, I think that is also part of the difficulty of the journey is that if you really decide you're going to travel the road and do the work, there are gonna be some challenges. There is going to be some hardship along the way. But then there's also that healing and that beauty that comes.
AF: If somebody is, let’s say, watching this or reading this interview, or reading the summary of the book, and they are thinking to themselves: “This is a little overwhelming. I'm interested. But where the heck do I even get started with this?” What would be your piece of advice?
AM: Wow! I think that there is something really beautiful about having another person to do something like this with, and to have someone who is accountable with you along the road. So, to have a friend who would want to play around with creative practice with you (could be helpful.)
At the end of the book, I give instructions for the practice of Prayer Squares. Honestly, that simple practice has been something that's my regular, a very regular practice, that I engage in. So, at least once a week, I sit down and do a Prayer Square for myself, and just engage and say, “What prayers are rising for me in this moment?” They're small, they're doable. They take 15 minutes. It's really just kind of an intro into it.
However, I think that the relationship piece of having someone else to be with and to explore with is important. I've been involved with the Musea community for a very long time, and that is a beautiful community of creators and artists. Women and men who are doing conscious work for themselves and that support community was a huge impetus for me to be able to decide I'm gonna really sit down with all the poetry I've created, and gather it, and put it into sections, and really put it into book form because there was something about having a community that I knew was this foundation that we've come upon, and to do that workaround. You know, even that visual foundation of “Who has been the support in my life, and who has just really been there?” For me, that visual of those supports. And if they're not, they don't necessarily have to be like real people that you've had a connection with. They don't have to be people that you personally know. It could be authors. It could be artists. It could be people in whatever work that you do, that you just admire and respect, but there are so many different ways to go about those foundations. And I think that for me, envisioning the support that you have really allows you to enter into this kind of work for yourself and to just go, “I’m gonna show up to myself in some way,” and it doesn't have to be drawing. It could be choosing to drink water every day or to take a walk every day. The bigger message of this book is the invitation to create a life of intention for yourself and to really connect with yourself as a creator, which means you get to make the life that you want to have.
AF: Absolutely. Not to be this person here, but what's next for you? Another book? Are we thinking maybe a song?
AM: Oh, man, yeah, I would love it. I definitely have ideas for another book. That's where I'm sitting right now is to just envision the next book, keep writing. Keep showing up to my art. Continue my own personal explorations of things that I'm really interested in and see where that road takes me. I think we have to tend to what we love in the world. And I'm always kind of paying attention. What are those things that I really love and want to spend time reading about or exploring in my life? And then how does that impact the art and the writing that I create?
AF: We talked a lot about healing the inner child or even the younger self. I'm wondering what you would say to Ally Markotich at, let's say, 24 or 23 years old, who probably was not even considering this pathway. What advice would you give to her?
AM: I think I would just give her a big hug. Oh, gosh! You know I think the twenties are such an exploratory decade. And there can be a lot of things happening in the twenties. I was pretty insecure as a creative person back in my twenties, and you and I know, going back to that, I think another wound around creativity is that in the art world, if you do actively create, whether you're a writer or an artist, a lot of times there's competition in those industries and at a lot of levels. You have to kind of go up against it, and I think that I was always very overwhelmed by the competition that was in the artistic world and finding creativity as a practice to just express yourself and to bring healing to your story through really good inquiry and through envisioning new ways forward, and all of this is just so helpful. But, going back to my 20-something-year-old self, I think that I would just tell her that you don't have to have it all. You don't have to have your path completely figured out. You don't have to know exactly where you're headed or what you're doing… to follow the lights on your path … to follow the things that make your light in your heart spark and that really bring you kindling in your life… to follow those things, and that when doors open that really feel good, to just follow that, and to not be afraid to take a risk and that everybody's path looks different. There’s no need to get caught up in the comparison game, just run your own race. Stay on your own path, and I think that would have, just maybe, given me a little bit of a heart boost back in the day.
AF: So, as we wrap up here, I’m wondering one last thing that you hope the readers will take away from your book.
AM: I think that what I hope readers take away from the book is that they are sacred, creative, and loved. That's really what I just feel so strongly, that if we come back to ourselves and really sit with our beingness, as being loved, and we are willing to take a chance on ourselves as creatives, I think that that can just bring an incredible amount of healing to our world. And I think our world needs that. I think our world needs to come back to ourselves and remember that we have a deep well of love and a deep bowl of fire that lives inside of us, and we to just continue to show up to it and kindle it, and feel the love.
AF: So excited for everybody to read it. It was fantastic, amazing job, as I've said over and over again. I can only gush so much couple of rapid fire questions. If you're down, I like to do this. There's only like 4 or 5. First thing that comes to the top of your head. We're gonna go through them real quick just kinda like a fun little thing I like to do at the end.
Okay, so favorite medium to express yourself. Music, art, poetry. You can only pick one.
AM: Oh, my gosh! I'd have to go with writing.
AF: Okay, at the end of the book, in poetic reflection, you talk about the color of your spirit. I want to know what the shape of your power is.
AM: The shape of my power. Oh, I definitely envision it as something that often shows up in my art. But it's kind of like a 5-sided star. It just goes out from the top and the sides.
AF: I can absolutely see that. When you think about all of the literature, art, and music that you've consumed over your lifetime, what is one piece that will always remind you why you love doing what you do?
AM: Oh, my Gosh! Like a book or an author?
AF: Whatever, a painting, a poem, or a song.
AM: Oh, my gosh, I would say that a book that really shifted my course was Sue Monk Kidd’s Dance of the Dissident Daughter, and that book just totally set me on a different kind of path for myself and really opened me up to the Sacred Feminine. And I'm just so grateful to her and her work in the world.
AF: Alright, last question. In your bio, you talked a little bit about how you're a truth seeker and look for positive things. And you also say that you're always looking for the best ice cream. I want to know what the best ice cream is.
AM: Oh, man! Well, we just actually over the weekend. Our family just took a ride to a little farm stand that is not that far away from our house. It's Ben’s in North Carolina, and their ice cream is the bomb.
AF: The best flavor. What do you have to get?
AM: Oh, I have to get chocolate peanut butter.
AF: Oh, good! Well, alright! Those are all my questions. Is there anything you want to add that I didn't ask you already?
AM: No, I feel like we covered it. Thank you so much. I really appreciate it.
AF: Thank you for taking the time to chat with me about it. Like I said, super excited. One last one. Where can people get copies of the book? Can they buy it on Amazon?
AM: So yes, but it's going to be available online, wherever books are sold. And my website is soulkindling.com, if people want to check out my work. Sometimes, I do classes, and you can work one-on-one with me. If people are interested in creative practice, they can work with me through my website because I do offer things.
Ally Markotich is an artist, poet, and Creative Formation Practitioner. She is the creator of Soul Kindling LLC, an online creative website where she offers courses and private sessions for people to spark their sacred imagination, open prayerful possibilities and nurture feminine intuition through color, drawing, and the magic of words. Ally is certified as a Red Thread Guide and Intentional Creativity® Educator from Musea under the guidance of artist, Shiloh Sophia. She is certified in Spiritual Formation from Columbia Theological Seminary and is a Holy Fire Karuna Reiki® Master in the tradition of Mikao Usui. She graduated with a BFA (Graphic Design) from Alfred University and lives in the Piedmont of North Carolina with her husband, two sons and yellow lab. On any given day, you may find Ally out and about searching for shiny truth, good books, and ice cream. You can find more of her art, musings and offerings at soulkindling.com.